Had this been a real emergency...

I dreamt least night that our house was haunted by a ghost who kept opening the front sliding doors and letting in a lot of cold air.

How annoying.

So, my hubby and I initiated an exorcism. We said prayers, and I, in my most commanding voice, demanded that the spirit leave. I called down the power of the almighty and told that ghost to go in the name of God.

Then God spoke.

And God was like, "Mary, I can't believe you bothered me for this."

...

Oops. Sorry, God. I didn't actually think you were listening.